"It's not like they're family." Sound familiar? If you're grieving the death of a friend, you've probably heard that from people who just don't get it. And if it made you angry, well, you're not alone. In the first of a series on grieving the death of a friend "Friend Grief and Anger: When Your Friend Dies and No One Gives A Damn", you'll meet people who also struggled with anger after their friend died. And they'll help you answer the question, "Okay, I'm angry - now what?"

It's been likened to a plague, but AIDS was never just a health crisis.

The second of a series on grieving the death of a friend, Friend Grief and AIDS: Thirty Years of Burying Our Friends, revisits a time when people with AIDS were also targets of bigotry and discrimination.

In stories about Ryan White, ACT UP, the Names Project, red ribbons and more, you'll learn why friends made all the difference: not just caregiving or memorializing, but changing the way society confronts the medical establishment and government to demand action.
2017 Second Edition now available!

"Families only " Those who were killed on September 11, 2001 left behind more than family members. They left thousands of friends who are often forgotten and ignored: co-workers, first responders, neighbors and survivors who struggle to find a way to grieve the friends killed when the World Trade Center towers fell.

In Friend Grief and 9/11: The Forgotten Mourners you'll learn how they adjust to life without their friends and find ways to honor those they lost on a clear, blue Tuesday.

"They were killing my friends."



That was how Medal of Honor recipient Audie Murphy justified his heroic actions in World War II. As long as there have been wars, men and women in the military have watched their friends die. Experts warn that delaying our grief will complicate our lives. But what about those who have no choice but to delay it until the battle is over?



In Friend Grief and The Military: Band of Friends you'll meet military and non-combatants who struggle with the grief and guilt of losing their friends. You'll learn, too, in the amazing ways they help each other, that 'leave no one behind' is a life-long commitment.

Honorable Mention, 2014 Chicago Book of the Year Awards

They're friends and coworkers, so when they die, it's not only a personal and professional loss but a challenge: How can you grieve and get your work done, too? In Friend Grief in the Workplace: More Than an Empty Cubicle you'll meet people whose friends were coworkers too: in a TV newsroom, a rectory, a Broadway show and on a baseball diamond. You'll learn how they met that challenge and continue to honor the friendships that lasted longer than 9-5.

"Be a man." Society expects men to take charge, get things done and keep their emotions in check. But what happens when their best friend dies and they're not allowed to grieve? In Friend Grief and Men: Defying Stereotypes you'll meet men whose friendships shaped their lives. Some lost a best friend. Some lost dozens of friends. Their stories of grieving and healing will change your perception of what it means to 'be a man'.

The history of the AIDS epidemic has largely been told from the perspective of gay men: their losses, struggles and contributions. But what about the women - in particular, straight women? Not just Elizabeth Taylor and Princess Diana, but thousands whose accomplishments have never been recognized? For almost forty years, straight women have have been affected by HIV/AIDS. They have fought for the right to be included in clinical trials and qualify for disability benefits. They have raised money and awareness. They have devoted their lives to caregiving, medical research and advocacy. But until now, their stories have been ignored or forgotten, even in accounts of women's history. Drawing on personal interviews and archival research, Fag Hags, Divas and Moms: The Legacy of Straight Women in the AIDS Community is the first book to share the stories of these women around the world, throughout the epidemic. Some of the names...

Grieving a friend is hard. Grieving a friend during a pandemic is a lot harder. What Our Friends Left Behind: Grief and Laughter in a Pandemic is a powerful and compassionate exploration of friend grief during the COVID-19 epidemic. This book sensitively addresses the unique challenges and emotions faced by people who have experienced the loss of a friend during these uncertain times. Through personal anecdotes, interviews, and expert insights, Victoria Noe delves into the profound impact of losing a friend and the specific grief journey that ensues. The book acknowledges the unique bond and significance of friendships and explores the complexities of grieving for a friend in a world upended by isolation, physical distancing, and limited opportunities for traditional mourning rituals. Noe’s book also highlights the power of honoring the lives of those friends, offering examples of meaningful tributes and finding solace in shared memories. It encourages readers to...

Grieving a friend is hard. Grieving a friend during a pandemic is a lot harder. What Our Friends Left Behind: Grief and Laughter in a Pandemic is a powerful and compassionate exploration of friend grief during the COVID-19 epidemic. This book sensitively addresses the unique challenges and emotions faced by people who have experienced the loss of a friend during these uncertain times. Through personal anecdotes, interviews, and expert insights, Victoria Noe delves into the profound impact of losing a friend and the specific grief journey that ensues. The book acknowledges the unique bond and significance of friendships and explores the complexities of grieving for a friend in a world upended by isolation, physical distancing, and limited opportunities for traditional mourning rituals. Noe’s book also highlights the power of honoring the lives of those friends, offering examples of meaningful tributes and finding solace in shared memories. It encourages readers to...

In UNSTOPPABLE: Straight Women on the AIDS Frontlines, Victoria Noe returns to the subject of her award-winning 2019 book F*g Hags, Divas and Moms: The Legacy of Straight Women in the AIDS Community. But this time, the author focuses on the shifting public health environment of today. Showcasing candid personal interviews that are complemented by extensive research, UNSTOPPABLE highlights the critical work of straight women to end the epidemic. Also explored are their responses to new challenges such as the COVID-19 pandemic and the second Trump administration’s dismantling of HIV services, research, and treatment. How do they respond to the erasure of their accomplishments? Is the goal of ending the epidemic by 2030 no longer possible? They are frustrated, exhausted, angry but determined. And they're not giving up.